Compliments increase the well-being of both expressers and recipients, yet in a series of surveys people report giving fewer compliments than they should give, or would like to give. Nine experiments suggest that a reluctance to express genuine compliments partly stems from underestimating the positive impact that compliments will have on recipients. Participants wrote genuine compliments and then predicted how happy and awkward those compliments would make recipients feel. Expressers consistently underestimated how positive recipients would feel but overestimated how awkward recipients would feel (Experiments 1-3, S4). These miscalibrated expectations are driven partly by perspective gaps in which expressers underestimate how competent-and to a lesser extent how warm-their compliments will be perceived by recipients (Experiments 1-3). Because people's interest in expressing compliments is partly driven by their expectations of the recipient's reaction, undervaluing compliments creates a barrier to expressing them (Supplemental Experiments S2, S3, S4). As a result, directing people to focus on the warmth conveyed by their compliments (Experiment 4) increased interest in expressing them. We believe these findings may reflect a more general tendency for people to underestimate the positive impact of prosocial actions on others, leading people to be less prosocial than would be optimal for both their own and others' well-being. (PsycInfo Database Record (c) 2021 APA, all rights reserved).

中文翻译：

---

赞美不够？：低估赞美的积极影响会阻碍表达赞美。

赞美会增加表达者和接受者的幸福感，但在一系列调查中，人们表示赞美的次数比他们应该或想要的要少。九项实验表明，不愿表达真诚的赞美部分源于低估了赞美对接受者的积极影响。参与者写下真诚的赞美，然后预测这些赞美会让接受者感到多么高兴和尴尬。表达者始终低估积极接受者的感受，但高估接受者尴尬的感受（实验 1-3，S4）。这些错误校准的期望部分是由观点差距驱动的，表达者低估了他们的赞美将被接受者感知的能力——在较小程度上有多温暖（实验 1-3）。因为人们表达赞美的兴趣部分是由他们对接受者反应的期望驱动的，所以低估赞美会给表达它们造成障碍（补充实验 S2、S3、S4）。因此，引导人们关注赞美所传达的温暖（实验 4）会增加表达赞美的兴趣。我们认为，这些发现可能反映了人们低估亲社会行为对他人的积极影响的更普遍趋势，导致人们的亲社会程度低于对自己和他人福祉的最佳状态。（PsycInfo 数据库记录 (c) 2021 APA，保留所有权利）。低估赞美会给表达它们造成障碍（补充实验 S2、S3、S4）。因此，引导人们关注赞美所传达的温暖（实验 4）会增加表达赞美的兴趣。我们认为，这些发现可能反映了人们低估亲社会行为对他人的积极影响的更普遍趋势，导致人们的亲社会程度低于对自己和他人福祉的最佳状态。（PsycInfo 数据库记录 (c) 2021 APA，保留所有权利）。低估赞美会给表达它们造成障碍（补充实验 S2、S3、S4）。因此，引导人们关注赞美所传达的温暖（实验 4）会增加表达赞美的兴趣。我们认为，这些发现可能反映了人们低估亲社会行为对他人的积极影响的更普遍趋势，导致人们的亲社会程度低于对自己和他人福祉的最佳状态。（PsycInfo 数据库记录 (c) 2021 APA，保留所有权利）。导致人们变得不那么亲社会，而不是为了他们自己和他人的幸福。（PsycInfo 数据库记录 (c) 2021 APA，保留所有权利）。导致人们变得不那么亲社会，而不是为了他们自己和他人的幸福。（PsycInfo 数据库记录 (c) 2021 APA，保留所有权利）。