Married Six Months, I Dream of the Ex I Long Thought I'd Marry,Ploughshares

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Married Six Months, I Dream of the Ex I Long Thought I'd Marry
Ploughshares ( IF <0.1 ) Pub Date : 2021-01-15 , DOI: 10.1353/plo.2020.0146
Katie Condon

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Married Six Months, I Dream of the Ex I Long Thought I'd Marry
Katie Condon (bio)

Married Six Months, I Dream of the Ex I Long Thought I'd Marry

The neighbor's pit-bull,who seemed determined to sniff outthe origin of the sky, disappeared months ago.

What luxury.

I dreamt of him last night.This time, in a field of blue delphiniums,he stepped toward mebefore vanishing as one vanisheswhen you knew them well

a long time ago. On mornings like this,I let myself imagine it is himwho grimaces through his pleasure,trying and failing to compelnew life within me.

Meanwhile, the sky—that architectof static—repeats and repeatsits monologue of light and rain.

I could sit with my desire—I could name it somethingelaborate, like: A Distaste for Comfortthat Stems from a Convictionof My Own Unworthiness.

Instead, I drive to the grocery storewhere the flowers are not meadowedbut manageably displayedinside their fridge. [End Page 52]

I will envy my reflected selfas she stands among them and recedesas the florist opens and closes and opens the doorto stock the white carnations. [End Page 53]

Katie Condon

Katie Condon is the author of Praying Naked (Mad Creek Books, 2020), winner of The Journal/Charles B. Wheeler Poetry Prize. She is an assistant professor of English at Southern Methodist University and lives in Dallas, Tex. with her husband, the writer Richard Hermes.

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