Although theorizing and research about asexuality have increased in the past decade, there has been minimal attention given to the emotional impact that living in a hetero- and amato-normative cultural context has on those who identify as asexual. In this paper, I address this research gap through an exploration of the ‘work that emotions do’ (Sara Ahmed) in the everyday lives of asexuals. The study is based on 15 individual interviews with self-identified asexuals living in Aotearoa New Zealand. One participant in the study used the phrase, ‘the onslaught of the heteronormative’ to describe how he experienced living as an aromantic identified asexual in a hetero- and amato-normative society. In this paper I consider what it means and feels like to experience aspects of everyday life as an ‘onslaught’. In particular, I look at some participants’ talk about experiencing sadness, loss, anger and/or shame as responses to/effects of hetero- and amato-normativity. However, I suggest that these are not only ‘negative’ emotional responses but that they might also be productive in terms of rethinking and disrupting hetero- and amato-normativity.

尽管在过去的十年中有关无性行为的理论和研究有所增加，但对异性和融合规范文化环境中生活给无性者的情感影响的关注却很少。在本文中，我将通过探讨无性恋者日常生活中“情感完成的工作”（Sara Ahmed）来解决这一研究空白。该研究基于对居住在新西兰奥特罗阿的自认无性恋者进行的15次个人访谈。这项研究的一位参与者使用了“异规范”的攻击来描述他如何在异规范社会和异规范社会中经历以识别为无性的芳香人的生活。在本文中，我认为将生活中的各个方面“缠身”是什么意思和感觉。特别是，我看一些参与者关于经历悲伤，失落，愤怒和/或羞耻的演讲，这些演讲是对异性和amato规范的回应/影响。但是，我建议这些不仅是“消极”的情感反应，而且在重新思考和破坏异质和锐利的规范性方面也可能是有成效的。