I explore how we negotiate sexual encounters with one another in language and consider the pragmatic structure of such negotiations. I defend three theses: (1) Discussions of consent have dominated the philosophical and legal discourse around sexual negotiation, and this has distorted our understanding of sexual agency and ethics. (2) Of central importance to good-quality sexual negotiation are sexual invitations and gift offers, as well as speech designed to set up safe frameworks and exit conditions. (3) Sexual communication that goes well does not just prevent harm; it enables forms of agency, pleasure, and fulfillment that would not otherwise be possible.

中文翻译：

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这就是她所说的：性谈判的语言

我探讨了我们如何用语言谈判彼此的性接触，并考虑这种谈判的语用结构。我捍卫三个论点：（1）关于同意的讨论主导了围绕性谈判的哲学和法律话语，这扭曲了我们对性能动性和道德的理解。(2) 对高质量的性谈判至关重要的是性邀请和礼物提议，以及旨在建立安全框架和退出条件的演讲。(3) 进行顺利的性交际不只是防止伤害；它实现了原本不可能实现的能动性、愉悦感和满足感。