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Interpersonal dynamics of women in midlife living with involuntary childlessness

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Abstract

Becoming a parent creates a new phase in adult development where the creation of a family brings new meanings and relational dimensions to one’s life. For people who are involuntarily childless, however, the absence of children can have a multifaceted impact on their everyday lives. Although extensive studies concerning childlessness have been conducted, past work has tended to have a clinical focus on women's infertility and fertility treatments and much less attention has been paid to how involuntarily childless people live beyond the phase of trying for a child while contemporaries pursue their lives with children. This study explores the experience of 11 White, heterosexual British women in midlife living with involuntary childlessness. To gain experiential insights, semi-structured interviews were conducted and transcripts analyzed using interpretive phenomenological analysis. Analysis reveals two interrelated key patterns exemplifying intrapersonal and interpersonal features. This paper focuses on the latter. The findings bring to light not only layers of complex relational issues caused by being involuntarily childless, but also different ways of reconstructing meaning in relational reconnections that impacted positively on developing generativity. The paper presents the dynamics unique to each woman and offers micro-level understandings helpful for health professionals, family therapists, life coaches, and researchers looking into childlessness and midlife/adult development.

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Acknowledgements

We thank all the participants for their courage in coming forward and sharing their experiences.

Funding

No external funding was either sought or obtained for this study.

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Authors and Affiliations

  1. Department of Psychological Sciences, Birkbeck University of London, Malet Street, London, WC1E 7HX, UK

    Megumi Fieldsend & Jonathan A. Smith

Authors
  1. Megumi Fieldsend
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  2. Jonathan A. Smith
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Correspondence to Megumi Fieldsend.

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Appendix 1: Interview schedule

Appendix 1: Interview schedule

I. Life at the moment (Practical things/activities in life now)

1. Could you tell me a bit about yourself?

 Prompts: job, family, hobbies, interests

2. What sort of things do you usually do on weekends or when you have free time?

 Prompts: How do you spend your free time?

 Do you go out often on weekends? If so, with whom?

3. What things make you feel good about yourself?

 Prompts: In what sort of situation do you find yourself feeling fulfilled?

II. Goals and Meaning of life

4. How do you feel about being your age (e.g. 50)?

 Prompts: What is the best thing about being (e.g. 50)?

 How about the worst thing about being (e.g. 50)?

 Mentally/physically/emotionally/spiritually

5. Do you think of yourself as having goals that you are working towards?

 If so, could you tell me about them?

 Prompts: Do you see yourself working towards something?

6. When you think about your future, say in five years’ time, what do you hope to be doing?

7. Could you tell me who the important people are in your life?

 Prompts: Could you tell me why? In what ways?

 Personally? Socially? Family?

III. The past

8. Could you tell me about the best thing that has ever happened in your life?

 Prompts: Personally? Socially?

9. Could you tell me about the biggest change that has ever happened in your life?

 Prompts: Personally? Socially?

 Could you tell me about the biggest decision you’ve ever made?

10. Do you see yourself as being the same person as you were when you were 25?

 Prompts: In what ways are you similar or different?

***If there is no reference to children, then I will bring it in as the last question

11. You said that you wanted to have children. How do you feel about it now?

12. Is there anything else that you feel we haven’t covered, that you would like to tell me?

  1. Note: This interview schedule is taken from the Supplementary material in “‘Either stay grieving, or deal with it’: The psychological impact of involuntary childlessness for women living in midlife,” by M. Fieldsend and J. A. Smith, 2020, Human Reproduction, 35.

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Fieldsend, M., Smith, J.A. Interpersonal dynamics of women in midlife living with involuntary childlessness. J Adult Dev 29, 159–170 (2022). https://doi.org/10.1007/s10804-022-09393-9

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