In this enquiry, I (the first author) as a teacher of English as a foreign language (EFL) reflect on my own deep-seated reluctance to use pair/group work activities in my classroom, although I am aware of the benefits of pair/group activities for second language (L2) learning as abundantly documented in empirical studies. Through an autoethnographic enquiry, I reflect on my broader lived experiences to investigate how my dispositional mindset towards pair/group work was formed in the course of my life. Data were primarily my personal experiences that I analysed drawing on the conceptual framework of Cultural Historical Activity Theory (Engeström, 1987). Analyses of my data showed that my teacher subjectivity towards collaborative activities has not derived from experiences in diverse educational settings. On the contrary, our findings illustrated that my mindset had been largely formed in my earlier personal experiences, even before my formal-schooling education, by the invisible norms of my family culture, itself a reflection of the larger ambient culture. The findings of this enquiry may open new windows of opportunities for teachers to draw on the emic approach of autoethnography to reflect on their own subjectivity which mediates their classroom practices.

在本次调查中，我（第一作者）作为一名英语作为外语（EFL）的老师，反思了我自己根深蒂固的不愿在课堂上使用结对/小组工作活动，尽管我知道结对的好处经验研究中大量记录的第二语言 (L2) 学习/小组活动。通过自我民族志调查，我反思了我更广泛的生活经历，以调查我对结对/小组工作的性格心态是如何在我的生活过程中形成的。数据主要是我根据文化历史活动理论（Engeström，1987）的概念框架分析的个人经验。对我的数据的分析表明，我的教师对协作活动的主观性并非来自不同教育环境的经验。相反，我们的调查结果表明，我的心态很大程度上是在我早期的个人经历中形成的，甚至在我接受正规教育之前，我的家庭文化中的无形规范本身就是更大的环境文化的反映。这项调查的结果可能会为教师打开新的机会之窗，让他们利用自我民族志的主位方法来反思他们自己的主体性，这些主体性调节了他们的课堂实践。