When older parents experience age-related functional limitations, adult children may begin to monitor and try to control their parents’ behavior. This shift can lead to tension due to differences in values both generations share, with parents prioritizing autonomy and self-sufficiency and adult children prioritizing safety and convention. Although a great deal of research on the transition from adolescence to adulthood focuses on governance transfer and changing boundaries of autonomy, monitoring, and control, less is known about how this happens in later life. The current study used qualitative methodology to explore the dynamic balance of autonomy, safety, and care between older parents and adult children who provide assistance in their daily lives. It focused on which areas adult children were most likely to monitor and try to control and how they did so, how parents respond to those efforts, and the dynamics of information management. Sixteen adult children who had at least one living parent (M_age = 53, SD = 6.1) discussed the challenges of managing two conflicting caregiving goals: respecting parents’ autonomy and ensuring parents’ moral well-being, health, and safety. Data were analyzed using directive content analysis. Although participants were concerned about the negative consequences of their parents’ current behaviors and health conditions, they rarely impinged on their parents’ autonomy until they were prompted by an authority figure or had clear evidence that their parents’ health or safety were threatened. Parents often kept information about their activities and well-being from their children in order to protect their autonomy. Implications for balancing parents and adult children’s goals of governance transfer are discussed.

当年长的父母遇到与年龄相关的功能限制时，成年子女可能会开始监控并试图控制父母的行为。由于两代人共享的价值观差异，这种转变可能导致紧张局势，父母优先考虑自主和自给自足，成年子女优先考虑安全和惯例。尽管关于从青春期到成年期过渡的大量研究都集中在治理转移和改变自主、监控和控制的边界上，但人们对这在以后的生活中如何发生知之甚少。目前的研究使用定性方法来探索在日常生活中提供帮助的年长父母和成年子女之间自主、安全和照顾的动态平衡。它侧重于成年子女最有可能监控和试图控制的领域以及他们如何做到这一点、父母如何回应这些努力以及信息管理的动态。至少有一位在世父母的 16 名成年子女（_Mage =  53, SD  = 6.1) 讨论了管理两个相互冲突的照顾目标所面临的挑战：尊重父母的自主权和确保父母的道德福祉、健康和安全。使用指令内容分析对数据进行分析。尽管参与者担心父母当前行为和健康状况的负面后果，但他们很少侵犯父母的自主权，除非他们得到权威人士的提示或有明确证据表明父母的健康或安全受到威胁。为了保护他们的自主权，父母经常向孩子隐瞒他们的活动和幸福感。讨论了平衡父母和成年子女治理转移目标的意义。