Differentiation of self refers to the capacity of individuals to manage their emotions, remain thoughtful in strong emotional experiences, and the ability to experience intimacy and independence in relationships. Individual differences in differentiation of self may influence the performance of mate retention behaviors. Because poorly differentiated individuals find separation and rejection unbearable and anxiety-provoking, we hypothesized that different levels of differentiation is related to different strategies of mate retention behaviors. However, little empirical attention has been given to the relationship between differentiation of self and mate retention behaviors, particularly in non-individualistic cultures. We aimed to investigate the mediating role of communication patterns in the relationship between differentiation of self and mate retention behaviors. The sample included 282 married individuals from Community Centers (some neighborhoods in Tehran, Iran). The results supported the associations between mate retention behaviors and differentiation of self, and also showed that communication patterns mediate this relationship. This study improves our understanding of differentiation of self and mate retention behaviors in the context of long-term committed relationships from an evolutionary psychological perspective.

自我分化是指个人管理情绪的能力，在强烈的情感体验中保持深思熟虑的能力，以及在人际关系中体验亲密和独立的能力。自我分化的个体差异可能会影响配偶保留行为的表现。由于分化差的个体发现分离和拒绝难以忍受并引发焦虑，因此我们假设不同水平的分化与不同的配偶保留行为策略有关。然而，很少有实证关注自我分化和择偶保留行为之间的关系，特别是在非个人主义文化中。我们的目的是研究沟通模式在自我分化和伴侣保留行为之间关系中的中介作用。样本包括来自社区中心（伊朗德黑兰的一些社区）的 282 名已婚人士。结果支持了择偶保留行为与自我分化之间的关联，并且还表明沟通模式可以调节这种关系。这项研究从进化心理学的角度提高了我们对长期忠诚关系背景下的自我和配偶保留行为差异的理解。