There is a clash between the idea of authenticity and the idea of deception. Here the author relates this clash to the rise in self-focus. Proposed is a model suggesting that the change in parenting as unreserved love, rather than rules and standards like etiquette, causes this increase in self-focus. In turn, self-focus leads to increases in shame, narcissism and perfectionism. It is this increase which promotes a self-interest focus and the idea of authenticity which takes precedence over the needs of others through shared rules of behavior, suggesting that deception has an important need in social life.

中文翻译：

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从欺骗到真实：自恋的兴起与礼节之死

真实性和欺骗性之间存在冲突。在这里，作者将这种冲突与自我关注的提高联系起来。提出了一个模型，该模型表明，作为无保留的爱而不是礼节等规则和标准的育儿方式的改变会导致这种自我聚焦的增加。反过来，自我聚焦导致羞耻感，自恋和完美主义的增加。正是这种增加促进了对个人利益的关注，并且通过共享的行为规则，真实性的观念优先于他人的需求，这表明欺骗在社会生活中具有重要的需求。